Wow.. its christmas~ :| I neva saw it coming... :|
its so sudden this year.. n i dunno what happened... but i have virtually no christmas spirit this year~! usually i'm in a pretty good mood n very in2 the spirit of things.. but this year... im just tired~ :| i think i rushed the shoppin 2 much.. n panicking runnin around like a headless chook lookin 4 pressies~ :|
But now that its all over n xmas eve is 2molo... kinda relaxing now at home n its starting 2 sink in... <:) at long bloody last~!!
Been doin a retarded amount of shoppin lately... n i am so broke now... so i cant wait til the xmas party 2molo nite where i can just kick back n relax abit n concentrate on getting drunk~ :) i have been sober way 2 long..
Fuck u pat~! now im gettin drunk like twice a week if im lucky~! Pok gai~!!
O wellz... i guess i just gotta fully get wiped out 2molo 2 make up 4 things..
Short post cos im buggered~~ haii~ long day~ :( explain more laters~~
I watched Elf... aiya... painful... painful 2 watch.... :|
neways.. me gone~! n if i dun do a post last min 2molo nite ( which i highly doubt i will ) then
MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE~!! Hope u all have a good n safe christmas~! :D:D:D:D

Wow.. woke up at 4pm 2day... talk about shocking.. :| :|
Not my fault... got sprung last nite.. well this morn... 5am got home... didnt drive car inside cos garage'll b 2 noisy.. so just parked in driveway... *sloooowly* opened the flyscreen, n ever so gently slide the key in the door... slowly twisting until the dull *thock* sound... pushed the door slowly... slowly.... took like 5 mins slowly open.... was near open when from upstairs i hear my mum "Who is it?"
i thought "Mahfucka~!" n kicked the door open walked in casually. Copped a mini lecture then but she didnt have the energy n i can play them like soft putty~ muahahaha~! ;)
o wellz... 4 sum dumbass reason i decided 2 read once i got home... 4 2 hrs... slept at 7am... :| haii~ o wellz..

Yea wellz.. was at my cuz's place... just us 2... doing sum.... "gardening".... n ahaha goddamn~~~ its been ages since the last time... faark~~ took 1 each... n then went shoppin 4 munchies... fark.. was at woolworths thinkin "hahaha~ these ppl.. they dont suspect a thing~! Heeheehee~!!" n then waltzed out... in the carpark i sed 2 tom... "Hahah goddamn man.. u act pretty straight..." he goes 2 me "yea u 2 man.. pity ur face is fucken purple"
Whafuck??
Look in the mirror n OMG ITS ATTACK OF LOBSTER MAN~!!!
Shiit... fucken hell.. i go red when drinkin fair nuff... but wit this shit??? goddamn`! o wellz~
Went back, took a few more.. n then just chillin watchin videos n chattin... he only had 1 computer left so no lanning~ n he has no games n shit...
u mite b thinking.. games? wat r u.. an idiot? but i'm tellin u... when u play games like this.... FUck man U R IN DA GAME~!!
First time i played a game like Counterstrike whilst err.... happy.... i waved my gun around feebly... n wheeeeee i've got a machine gun~!! goddamn u really feel like u're in the game.. n after happily running around 4 awhile ( i believe i thought i was *skipping*... n i was humming 2... ).. Ray jumps out n sprays me with bullets~!
I scream "OMG U SHOT ME~!!!!!" n then ran off n hid in a lil corner whimpering...
he found me n drilled me...
after that kinda just lost the plot runnin round on a giggling killing spree...

err...
where was i? but yea.. ppl ask wats it like... its like.... funny...
U're so mellow n happy... every1s smiling every's happy... u neva get nausea, dizzyness or headaches n hangovers like alcohol... but its just as nice... nicer mebbe... cos everything is FUCKEN FUHNEE BEYOND ALL REASON.. n funny things starts 2 happen... like ur left foot suddenly gets heavier than ur rite.. so u're limping.. or ur toe starts talking 2 u....
hmmm... just me?
Funny shit nevertheless~

Koncret3 needs a friend to go christmas shopping with...
Free ice cream 4 volunteers...
Limited time only...

n on another note:
www.marryyourpet.com

Eep.

'Nuf sed.

Goddamn this weathers fucked at West Pennant hills... thunderstorm all morning... but the fucked thing was how loud it was~!! Holy shit i think it must've been directly above us or sum shit~!! it was SOOOO FUCKIN LOUD~!!! It sounded like a cannon... seriously... not a deep bass rumble... but a short brief intense *BOOOOOM~!!!!!!!!!* I sleep like the dead... i can sleep thru my house alarm.. but even this was able 2 wake me up ( 4 a few seconds neways.. )... there was 3 separate instances where it was so loud ( when i was semi-awakened by them... i was still asleep n when i ko'ed they were incorporated in2 my dreams... weird... ).. that i could feel my ear drums being pushed in by the sheer pressure of the noise... i am not exaggerating in the slightest~ :| :| :|

Blah~

neways... Phils gone ages ago... Jane with him.... Ya in korea gettin drunk.... Nat n Tim in vila sunbaking.... Pats gone now... bunko leaves next week on da 17th... wilmas married... kens busy chasing every skirt he sees... Ian got hit by a car... Mel looks like a stressed mother of 2... Jens a angry stressed out asshole even tho its holidays.... Kat ignores me... Chris works 24/7 at ungodly hours.... Tamara hides from me... Tessa n Dave r in rehab... Amex avoids direct eye contact n Tinyan is strange.... :| :| :|

Haiii~~~ methinks its time 2 start socialising with my long lost neglected friends...

Tuesday.. had the farewell thingy... at Pancakes... which just ended up as me, pat, bunko, ken n tinyan... :| Mel n Lil jen rocked up afterwards but goddamn... mebbe they shouldn't... Lil jen arrives, rolls down the window n immediately lets fly a flood of profanities at us... sumthin bout how the fuck is she gunna get home... we look at each other... *shrugs*
she gets agitated n looks like a quivering kettle at boiling point... then lets loose with a explosion that sounds like a tape recorder being fastforwarded... high, squeaky n 2 fast 2 catch nething...

Meanwhile mel on the other side looked beyond dead... she looks like one of those mothers with like 5 children n just doesnt give a shit nemore... like a zombie... Go 2 her side of the car 2 ask whats wrong... but aiya~~~ scary~!! she had "NOT HAPPY JAN" plastered all over her face~ :| For the rest of the nite there was only a few glimpses of the old cheerful mel that we knew... MEL~!!! WAT HAPPENED~?!?!?
Aiya... but felt sooooo guilty calling her out now... pat feels the same.... n especially cos she had 2 cancel sum plans 2 make it.. even tho i we werent doin much neways~ :( just bummin around as usual ... but this time at pyrmont with a view~! :D
haiiz... o wellz... i'll go back 2 only calling the girls out when i have a party on or sth... :(

Shit... more 2 say but now gotta run... watching scary movie 3 wit Chog, Hwonka n the Fairy Fag....

MEL THE BASTARD!!! Goddamn.. *note 2 self... change password asap~!!*

Man.. computer fucking up so havent been posting.. i'll try 2 do sum more later...

Goddamn... was drinkin wit pat at his place last nite ( da 2 amigoes )... random conversation n toasts... we came 2 the conclusion that... dying is bad... so don't do it... this was after hearing bunkos story bout sum drunken asshat that died after drinkin on his balcony n pking... we were on the balcony cos didnt wanna wake up pat's family so yea... scary..

Woke up this morning, n goddamn fuck me dead my right testicle was KILLING ME~!! Jesus christ ~! its sooooo sore~~ even now~ omg.. n its 2.40am... spent all day walkin in pain n when i sit, i gotta sit down ever so gently, gently laying my lil eggs 2 rest on the chair...
Mr winky is in agony~ :(

Neways... sum quick summaries of wats been happening... bit hard cos the past week has just been a strange yellow blur... days n weeks melt 2gether n i have no concept of time...

Okaay~
Tues, got drunk, thurs got drunk, n fri... I did the impossible... i got drunk on Passion Pop... OMG~!!! i cant believe it~!! We were outta drinks cept the vodka n since i dont touch that nasty shit... only choice was Pp~! I wasnt even meant 2 get drunk~! i had work next day~! fucken hell~! but yea~~ i remember playin all the stupid silly asian drinking games... n then gettin really hot n needing a break.. i closed my eyes... n when i opened them again ... FUCK every1's gone~!!! my sis n her friends were still there n i asked "Where's the party~?!"
Asshole sister: "What? They left AGES ago~!!"
Super munki majik: "WTF? How come no1 told me~?!??"
Bitchy violent sister: "U said goodbye 2 them u idiot~!!"
Went 2 bed at 3am... woke up 5am with hangover... cant get back 2 sleep, had work n then at nite had a VERY UNSUCCESSFUL FAREWELL 2 POOF COS OF THE GIRLS~!!!!!!!!!! All of them bailed the bastards~! OMG~!! cept Chris n Tamara... they rock~ :)

Even tho.. chris is a small lil black girl who claims 2 b asian n wouldnt look out of place on a harley davidson ( if they make kid sized ones that is... ).. Tamara on the other hand is a gweilo who always has a lil secretive smile as if ur fly's undone n shes happy 2 let u walk around all day not knowing...
N if i think about it... i cant... really... remember tamara's voice at all... :| she barely says 2 words~! im serious~! chris goes off like crazy baboon n cant get that lil thing 2 shut up n yet her gf is totally the opposite~! Tamara~! its ok 2 talk 2 me lor~~ im not as scary as i look~ im a pretty friendly guy~~ :D drunk.. but friendly... or was it friendly cos of being drunk..? i cant tell nemore...

where the fuck am i going with all this? i have no idea.. but its gettin late so yea.. i'll make it fast... so yea.. sat nite just had a boys nite... havin a poker nite, blew up my spa sumhow... gettin that fixed...

I'll post more laters cos FUCKEN i cant stand the dull throbbing pain that is my right testicle atm~!! Im gunna go 2 bed full starfish.... its getting worse~! OMG~! if i prod it with my finger, OMG it feels like its in a clamp~!
Make it stop~!!! im tempted 2 resort 2 DIY amputation~!!
I think with my virile manhood i should b able 2 produce enuf sperm with 1 dim sim left....

*thinks...*

...

*Attacks testicles with screwdriver*

Melissa is a goddess.

Nod.

Haiz... i is awake...
Tried getting drunk last nite.. rather unsuccessfully... we only had 1/3 whisky left.. so pat being the spoilt girl that he threw a lil tantrum n a sook so i left that 4 him n i had midori instead...
4 those of u that dont know... i *hate* really sweet drinks... n i had 2 down all that green shit last nite... just left me feeling sober n nauseous while pat was hanging off the chandelier giggling like scooby doo...
that dickface.... man last time i take 1 4 da team... >:(

N tuesday~! had my housewarming.. well kinda... mostly it was 4 mel ( yes. i have given up changin names cos seems like the majority of my friends dun give a shit if i pay em out on da net )... she didnt do nething 4 her 21st last month.. cept go out with her gf... ( which is pretty sweet tho )... but i just thought that u *had* 2 have sum cake wit ur friends at least.... so yea..
goddamn... im surprised i survived the ordeal... the nite b4... my insomnia kicked in again... i slept at 3am.. n then at 5am.. i woke up.. bright n mind full alert... felt like i've been sleepin 4 days... could not go back 2 sleep so just went n watched sum cheesy cartoons...
Spent the rest of the day runnin round eastwood n epping buying drinks, alcohol, munchies n of course.. mels cakes~! Got home in the late arvo.. n then collapsed on the welcome mat... :|
well.. my bed but i nearly ko'ed there~!
O wellz.. at least the nite was pretty sweet... was stressed when ppl arrived.. cos i had 2 go runnin round pickin ppl up still ... made the fatal error of leaving my sister in charge 4 awhile... told her 2 order pizza... theres like 20 plus ppl... n she orders 5 pizzas...
Why god?? y did u curse me with such a ridiculously stupid family??? What have i done 2 piss u off??? I've still been sacrificing shaven midget llamas on every full moon in ur name~!!! WHY?~!?

After the first hr of the party slowly n quietly going insane in my mind worrying bout ppl not having food.. ordering more food but taking 2 long... ppl not having drinks.. ppl separating in2 small groups n not gettin along... i just resorted 2 my trusty good friend alcohol... n voila~!! i didnt give a shit no more~! :D hahaha~~ ppl breaking off in2 small groups~? Bleh~!! fend 4 urself cos if u dont enjoy urself thats ur own problem... i supply the food, drinks n ppl... if u cant try 2 get along fuck it im gunna have myself sum fun~! ;) Muahaha~~

But again.. most ppl bailed me early... no1 got drunk cept me n pat... *again*... (well i think azuu got tipsy but she dont count..).. was tryin hard 2 gettin 2 all those that didnt need 2 drive 2 drink... but every1 had an excuse... "... I dont drink..", "I gotta get up early n work 2molo...", "it burns when i wee..." BLAH~!! i heard em all b4~!! :~( o wellz..

In my memory... thru a cloudy haze.... i see myself rambling on n on n on like a parrot on speed... n yet.... i have no idea wtf i was goin on bout... PLEASE~! Those that were sober that nite... tell me wat the fuck i was goin on about cos im really interested~! Nething that can get me talking THAT long gotta b good~!!!

Meanwhile pat was giggling beside me all nite n i remember every now n then my conversation gets interrupted by a dull thump n i look beside me n see a trembling foot n half an ass stickin up in the air... i think he gets cheap thrills from ko'ing...

Met a new girl.. Catherine... mel's friend... seems really nice... quiet... but nice.... until i read her blog n she was paying me out like crazy~!! OMG~!!! full goin off sth bout me being gay... sth bout havin small penis... n even mother Taiwan~!! OMG~!! aiya~!!
N apparantly she was feeling ill cos of chris's ( aka "Shiaow hei" .. oops sorry mel.. "Xiao hei"... bleh.. no 1 can read that.. ) relentless assault of burps n farts... I was readin this n just thinking... goddamn she lucky that bunko, king of all bodily wastes wasnt there that nite~! haha~! man that lil afro bastard u c is just a cocoon 4 a collection of shit, piss n methane... goddamn he farts sooo fuckin much i suspect he stores it under pressure in his skull~~!!! N Catherine... im serious bout taiwan lor... ok its not that clean... but theres lotsa technology there.. its basically the same as hong kong but in diff language... :)

Neways.. that was a random bunch of jibber... kinda lost track of wat i was goin on bout sumwhere there... :| :| :| sorry.. i hope it made sense... i'm 2 tired rite now 2 go back n edit it.... need sleep... :(